Get Out of Town

I lathered little Styles with sunblock, slipped on his swimming trunks, topped him off with a sun hat, and made a run for the North. During my family’s recent visit, I wanted to share with them a place where the air is warm and the water is cool. Where else, but Glen Ellen! I know what your thinking, but they're from Hawaii! Different. The current heat wave had me dreaming of the pool.

My friendly gesture did not go over very well with my parents. As we drove over the Golden Gate bridge, which any normal person would oogle in awe, they were both slighted. My catholic kicked in and I felt guilty for uprooting them from the house. “Huh, it’s sunny here,” mom steadfast with her small conversation. I felt like I had performed a big fat juicy mortal sin. I wanted to please my parents. You know, be a lovely daughter for once. Besides they haven't been anywhere past Sausalito. I thought a nice drive and sightseeing would be harmless. Dad broke his silence and uttered, “The pastures’s brown here? Not enough water here? Where’s the cows?” Ugh, now I had to pull a cow out of my hat? I reminded them that there should be cows, I don’t know when, but they should appear soon.

We were twenty minutes into the drive when mom started to lose it, “Oh my god! It is so far away?” I thought her hair caught fire. “Daughter this is far,” dad was not entertained. “You said forty five minutes.” Mom vexed with apprehension. “It’s only been twenty minutes mom. Sheesh, I’m not driving to China or anything. Just chill.” I was plagued with questions. Sigh. My shoulders began to tighten. I pointed out the endless acres of grapes that shadowed our drive. “Grapes?” Mom was curious, “why so many grapes?” I reminded her that wine came from grapes and we were driving in a region that was world famous. “Oh yeh?” Dad scuffed, “Hmph. Wine? That's crazy.” He found it absurd and ridiculous. Mom was unimpressed. I dismissed the fact that my parents are very simple people. The only wine my parents sipped is the communion wine. Christ on a cross, why in the hell was I dragging them to Sonoma? If the gods are on my side, maybe they’ll fall in love with Glen Ellen too.

What started as a wonderful 45 minute drive, transformed into a bottomless pit of agony. On and on, I was battered with questions. Dad continued to moan about the length of the drive. They were two fishes on land. Flopping! How a glass of roset would alleviate this scene. Poof! I wished Shane was here to muddle the situation, but wishing’s for suckers. I’ll just have to deal. As I am finessed in the art of lethargy, my parents were proficient in the litany of labor. By mile 30, the thought of why I moved hundres of miles away became apparently clear. Although Hawaii is a paradise, it is still a rock. The locals can only handle no more than a twenty minute drive, anything beyond that is considered obscene.

Destination Glen Ellen. I grabbed Hunter and made a bee line for the pool. The rest of my family should be arriving soon. Things turned for the worse for mom as she paced with her arms crossed and was all sorts of odd quiet. If I had a valume, I would’ve slipped it in her water. You can quote me on that.

Finally, the rest of my family arrived! In the sky, I swear to virgin mary and all her cronies, a rainbow appeared across the sky! It was a sign! Phew! The kids tussled in the water. Dad waded in the deep end. Chloe did a little doggy paddle of her own. We cheered little Hunter as Shane dipped him in the crisp cool water. Another first! Yet, Mom sat under the umbrella arms crossed worried about dinner and who was going to cook.

Despite the squabbing and the mechanics of my infinite family dysfunction, I am lucky that we are together. The beutiful sunshine coating my brown skin with warmth as I dangle my feet in the water, I sip from the glass of roset, and Hunter is cozy in my lap. Relax. All is good in the world.

This is Shellie having a splash of a time back to you Bob at the studio!

Walk Don't Run

During Grandma Colleen’s visit my San Francisco perception broadened. The mere introduction to Stow Lake and the Arboretum (fancy word for botanical garden) added spark to my day. My walks mostly entailed Crissy Fields, Fort Funston, or Land's End. Change is always good! Aunt Nyra is a total walkaholic and privy to San Francisco strolling spots. She swore me to secrecy when she permitted the concealed parking spot to the lake. All secrets at my disposal, I felt dangerous, yet special. Smile.

We - Grandma Colleen, Jill, Aunt Nyra and Hunter- strolled a couple laps around the manmade lake. It was my first step to shaking this heavy thing called weight. It felt great to take in the fresh morning air amongst the fellow strollers. An onlooker was shaken up by a defenseless baby duck that was ravaged by a seagull. Honestly, I was more befuddled by the seagull being in Golden Gate park. Aunt Nyra in all her blessed sensitivity dismissed it as nature than later regretted her frank, but honest remark. If you had seen the cute ducklings innocently scaling the serene lake you too would sling shot the next seagull that crossed your path.

Aunt Nyra proceeded to navigate the group to the short cut that led to a flight of stairs and gradually opened to a path, leading to the DeYoung Museum as well as the botanical gardens. We had lunch at the museum and than ventured into the wild gardens. As small as it seems from the outside, the Arboretum is grand. I was never big into gardens until today. Wowza! It is an agricultural nerds wet dream! If not educational, certainly stunning! Paths cross into different areas that represent a region of the world’s and it’s indigenous plants. Aunt Nyra was in desperate search for the varietals of succulence, instead we dodged sprinklers like land mines. We opted to return back to the lake for more ass whipping workout.

Today, I am inspired. I was struck by the tranquility of the trees and the lake. I was overwhelmed by the animal life like the tiny turtles that nonchalantly sunbathed on the lonely log and the ducklings that waddled behind momma duck. I was amazed by the stoic crane that majestically stood alone in nature. I chuckled at the families that exhaustingly paddled the boats with no end in sight. Mostly, I was consumed by the joy that it was Hunter’s first time in Golden Gate park. A big shout out to my Aunt Nyra, Jill, and Grandma Colleen, "Thanks for a wonderful day!"

This is Shellie with not one dull moment to my name back to you Bob at the studio.

Feast or Family

My side of the family is just as sweet as an insane asylum. We function in dysfunction, it makes my life fun and interesting! I love them to death! That's why I moved hundreds of miles away! Chuckle. My blood pressure took a staggering leap as the days came closer to their arrival. It just so happens the Cadelinia's visit intersected with my nephews high school graduation. Double duper. I am over the moon to see mom. She's been driving a nail through me for decades when it comes to children. She persisted, knowing I had no potential candidates as a husband at the time. Albeit, I want her all to myself. I can't wait for her to traipse in with her sweet filipino jubilee goodness gop! I miss her! I shall have her all to myself. Ahem, I mean my son will.


My parents arrived around ten o’clock pm. Mom was even keel on the drive from the airport. She diligently inquired about Hunter and his behavior. Dad, in usual dad fashion, kept to himself. So far, so good.

Mom and Dad knocked on the door as we prepared for bed, "This is for Hunter. Put it in his savings." They both stood above him smiling. Dad caressed his cheeks and bid us good night. It was a hundred dollar bill. Shit on a shingle! They've figured out a way to get me all choked up! A hundred dollar bill from my parent's equates to a herd of cows, three dozen chickens, and twenty pigs in the days of old. Wow! Dad was a field laborer for the sugar plantation for decades bringing in an estimated $200 a month to support a family of ten. They sold produce at the farmers market and raised live stock to prevent us from starving. Powdered milk and a block of welfare cheese anyone? Being in their presence is always humbling. I don't how they did it! Heck mom can lasso a miracle when it comes to saving money. She always has money. Note to self, must be more like mom.

The next morning I was awaken by the curious sound of light paper shredding. I turned over and returned to sleep. I sat up in bed, an hour later, as Hunter snoozed next to me, there at the end of the bed sat a piece of B. Franklin's receding hairline. Gasp, Chloe had gotten her scrappy paws on the bill that was on the nightstand! Before my brain could scrape a bit of understanding of the situation, as much as I would have liked to splat her against the wall, I swiftly whapped that Bichon! Meanwhile, mom and dad peeked in their smiles and delight transformed to emotional arsenal, "What happened!" She was distraught, "Is that the money we gave Hunter?" I sullenly nodded. Dad continued in his silent bout, but his eyes said it all, he would rather had thrown Chloe against the wall and kicked her down the flight of stairs. I quickly scrambled to gather the pieces. To think, last night I boasted on how well behaved this white mop was.

I distracted them by handing Hunter over, "Here momma." Mom knew my tactic. I had to do something before it snowballed. Crap, all of the labor and work that went into that money. There was a gloom about the air, "You should give that dog away." Mom sliced through the awkward silence with her sensibilities, "What?" She shrugged her shoulders as she gently rubbed Hunter's back. It was the word according to mom. Dad remained statuesque enthralled by The Price is Right. The hellfire in his eyes had died down. If this had happened in the Cadelinia home, it would be fire and brimstone. Chloe would be first grade pâte.

Beside the money snafu, my siblings and their families were here! Yay! Our reunions revolved around feasting layered with laughter and idle gossip which entailed our brushes with childhood. A good time was to be had by all. Hunter was passed around the room with comparisons to his fellow cousins. Everyone clucking on his looks, "He looked a little like Robert when he was a baby." Chris, eldest, found the resemblance remarkable. "Nah, he looks like Zashtani." Darrell chimed in. "I think he looks like Uncle Shane! He's soo cute!" Little Alyssa jumped in unafraid to slug it with the adults. "He is so adorable." Sydney agreeed wholeheartedly with her little sister. In the corner of my eye, mom sat enjoying her room full of loved ones. Dad sat slouched with arms crossed resting his eyes.

I am super charged that Hunter is privileged to be part of the Cadelinia experience. As hectic as the Cadelinia's reunions can be and as crazy as we are, I embrace each sparse visit like catching a falling star. Family is vital. It is my heritage. It is who I am. Now I have one of my own. It's about time.

This is Shellie basking in the milky way of life back to you Bob at the studio!