Miseducated

Oh my god! Oh the aching of my head. One word, preschool. Everyone’s making a fuss about it. Shane’s more concerned about the tuition than the curriculum. Curriculum! I know the kids three years old, what curriculum is considered standard at that age, “make sure to color within the lines.” Seriously, preschool should be an introduction to social interaction than academics. My brain is on the verge of busting! Advil por favor. Waiting list. Tuition. Waiting list. Gender balance. Waiting list. The crux to my dilemma.

Speaking of crux, a Marin Day school is two blocks from my office. Convenience, besides he would riding the train into the city. How tres’ chic! I discovered the tuition was $18,500 a year; not convenient. My Spanish speaking nanny cost more dough and she didn’t speak English, I’m tired of constant bum violations. Painful. In fact, the Lycée Français La Pérouse is only $14,000! I can dig that! I’m on the waiting list for the Chinese American, Japanese immersion, Italian immersion, Spanish immersion. I’ve got an interview with Temple Emmanuel. Yes, Jewish why not we’re in San Francisco? Diversity, I’m from Hawaii I can handle it. I’m in a whirlwind of open houses, tours, and applications. There’s one particular preschool that has a stellar reputation among the community that runs $7,600 a year! It would only be in good taste that there be a waiting list the size of Noah's Ark and Hunter is on that list. The big kick in the shin is his acceptance is based on gender balance. That’s right, the strict balance of gender in that particular class enrolled. Suddenly, the room is shrinking and getting smaller. My chest is tight and heavy…can’t breath….must…make way to bed…to…lie down.

My sister soon brought me down to earth, “we didn’t go to preschool? So what’s all the fuss?” The fuss is I wish I did. In true parent fashion, I want the best for my son. It does not mean that he should be enrolled in the top preschool. Will he benefit from being bilingual? Is yoga an integral growth into his spiritual being? Education augmented by theories and challenging philosophies stem at such an early age in San Francisco, I can see why parents are psychotic babbling neurotic freaks about the entire ordeal. Whatever happened to enhancing the simple social interaction of a three year old child? Go climb a tree! Learn to share. Sit in a circle and sing. Finally, what ever happened to simply laugh induced playing? I patiently await the phone call, in the meantime I go about my business. It all filters down to one laughable, but important factor, it’s only preschool.

This is Shellie popping my colorful meds back to you Bob at the studio.